So I’ve been off of work for the last month recovering from a surgery and damn… it’s been a good reset. I usually work nightshift and was able to see the sun daily and actually be productive in my home life. I also was able to visit and spend time with the people in my life that I love dearly.
In all honesty I’ve been pretty shitty with making an effort to see people in person the last year. I apparently have developed some anxiety with breaking my schedule/routines and leaving the house in general. I used to be more social, but especially since COVID I’ve found reasons not to see people. This month has reminded me how important it is to follow through with plans and make an effort to spend time with the people in my life. I regret the amount of time I’ve spent in the last year avoiding social outings and missing parties. I need to be better. To do better.
I want my nephews to know who I am. I want to make more memories with my grandparents. I want to spend time with my amazing husband and spend hours hanging out with him. I want to bond with my brother-in-law so he remembers how fucking awesome I am after he eventually moves out. 🙂
I want the people in my life to know how important they are to me before they’re gone. I don’t want to be anti-social and sleeping all the time because my schedule is so wacked out. I need to be better at flipping my schedule on my off days so my mental health improves. I don’t think I’ve had one suicidal/majorly depressive thought in the last month which is fucking impressive for me.
This last month has been a blessing. This is my personal reminder to put forth the effort into my relationships and to remember how lucky I am to have my friends and family. Also to see the fucking sun… low vitamin D levels aren’t a joking matter (thanks mom).
Tomorrow I go back to work… and it will continue to be okay.
-Hal
AO Poetry 